Four Little Words

I love you.

Three little words that mean so much to so many.

However, to some, these words don't mean much.

Growing up, I heard them often.  These three words fell very easily from the lips of my parents.  As they dropped me off at school, read fairy tales and bible stories to me, and as they tucked the blankets tight around me just before I drifted off to sleep, these words were repeated. 

I love you.

As I grew, I noticed other words they added to this phrase to make sure I got the picture. 

Very much.

So much.

I will always...

Nothing can change that.

...and I am so proud of you.

And I can honestly say that these words were accompanied by actions.  They provided. The two of them spent time with me. My mother took me shopping. My dad let me help him on the farm. They sat at summer softball games, help me pack my bags for church camp, cheered me on at band competitions, and supported me when I ran for various leadership positions. 

I continue to hear and feel these words today. Though the voices that continue to speak them now sound a bit older, I still feel like the little girl who found unbelievable comfort and joy each time the words and actions let me know that I was sincerely and deeply loved. My mom and dad continue to sincerely and deeply love me.

But perhaps, there has been a little saying that has come to mean even a bit more to me over the years from these two.  The phrase is one that they only use between the two of them. I have heard them verbally speak the words to the other. I have seen it written in birthday cards and on notes attached to Christmas packages they exchange. I have seen it grace the card my dad puts in my mom's Valentine roses. I have found it written between them on bathroom mirrors and on napkins and on scraps of paper.

I just love you.

Ok, so I first I didn't get it.  I would think...

"Really? You JUST love her/him? That sounds so simple and flippant! Scream it from the rooftops, daddy. Jump up and down, mom. Get with it, you more than JUST love each other!"

But in the last few years, it's all beginning to make sense to me.  Since hearing and seeing them exchange it this past holiday season, it has stuck with me.  It's been swirling around in my mind.

It is that simple. There are no strings attached. My mom doesn't have to cook the dinner every night to be loved.  My dad can get a little touchy and say the wrong thing and still be loved. They can have different opinions and still sit down on the couch and love the person with who they share their popcorn. They can make mistakes. They can be imperfect. They are still just loved. 

Love should not be dependent on a set of given actions.  For that matter love should not be dependent on any action at all.  We should love because that is just what we are called to do. 

Jesus didn't love the woman at the well because she had a pristine past and gave him a drink of water.  He didn't love Peter because he was cool and even tempered.  Jesus didn't love the poor and sick because he felt sorry for them. He didn't love Zacchaeus because he was tall and good looking. Jesus didn't love Mary because she sat at his feet, and he didn't love Martha because she kept her house clean and baked a casserole. He didn't love Caiaphas because he was loved in return. 

He just loved them. That is what he was sent to do.

"Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends."

John 15:13

And that is what we are called to do.  We are to just love others. 

Not because they are awesome at loving us back. Not because they cook our meals, buy us cool clothes, and invite us into their homes. Not because they follow the same path in life that we follow. Not because they agree with us and belong to a certain group. Not because they are our family members, friends, or spouses. 

We are to love them, JUST because.

"But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back."  Luke 6:35

In our churches we have to stop insisting that folks start looking like us, thinking exactly like us, and acting like us before we let them through our doors, on our pews, and in our circles. We must love them exactly where they are at.  And we must continue to just love them, no matter the outcome.  

"Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins." 

I Peter 4:8

I heard something along these lines from a speaker the other day..."A faith based and built on love will never win others over through actions of dislike and hate."

Love shouldn't have limitations and expectations. It should be filled with grace and mercy. 

"Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God."

I John 4:7

I have been asking God a lot lately to help me see things more clearly.  I sat down on the carpet in my living room the other day and pretty much pleaded to be given some answers, and make it fast. I need a solution. A way to fill the holes the world seems to leave in me as I pillow my head at night. My heart doesn't need to be so lonely. 

That's when my mind takes me back to Christmas, watching my parents open presents and read cards. I see the two of them smile and look at each other. I hear my dad's voice, full of genuine care, joy, and companionship...

I just love you.

That is my Heavenly Father. No doubt. He put that memory in my mind and these things on my heart this week in order for me to hear Him loud and clear.

I am just loved.